A Now Which is Outside of Time

Today in my World Religions course I introduced students to Buddhism by showing them portions of Bertolucci's movie Little Buddha.  I remembered of course that it was the seeing of old age, sickness and death that set Siddhartha forth on his quest for enlightenment.  But sometimes the truth of our transitoriness strikes more deeply than others.  For a long time I have been considering my own death, and viewing my time through death's lens. As the days and months pass this truth seems more and more salient.  What do I want to be doing with my final years (or hours)?  Can I just sit comfortably with the truth that I have avoided in so many ways: work, entertainment, exercise, wine?

Each morning I practice Guru Yoga.  When my teacher Locho Rinpoche was alive that meant reaching out to him from my heart-mind and touching his; connecting until we merged.  Really that was a telepathy of sorts. In October he died.  I still practice Guru Yoga, but now when I reach out and touch him, what am I touching?  The materially embodied Rinpoche that exists in the past or disembodied Rinpoche that exists in the present?  I am not sure.  Perhaps both. I've asked .......

The question is of huge importance.  In the course of giving us a Guhyasamaja initiation he once said that when he was enlightened we would all be in his circle of disciples. Sometimes I can feel myself sitting in that circle. Am I touching him in the future?  

Or are all of these wrapped up in a single now which is outside of time?

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